Now that Princess Tony is attending his last party conference as Labour Cappo Don, I thought I would offer our beleaguered but testosterone laden premier a few helpful tips regarding new career opportunities.
I know Tone is probably scanning the Guardian sits vacs for suitable jobs, but I don’t think he’s got much of a hope really…… I mean, if one day you’re ordering men to certain death in a futile demonstration of leadership virility – and the next you’re doing a nine to five as a deputy integration officer (class 2) for Lambeth Council…. Well, it’s a bit of a comedown – and I don’t think the Princess’s ego could cope to be honest.
No, Tony needs the cash – a lot more than the £15,486pa + gravy coupons and leather elbow patch allowance that a council job in Lambeth can offer. Tony also needs to be loved and adored throughout the western world – just like he imagines he is now…
So with this in mind I’ve been thinking outside of the luncheon box – and come up with the first in a series of suggestions that may help our beloved leader snap up that dream job opportunity.
Suggestion 1 – Character in The Simpsons.
Qualifications, Must be two dimensional, shallow and yellow. Previous experience as a cartoon character an advantage. Should have comic features and ridiculous hair that could easily be transferred to acetate so we can all have a bloody good laugh…..
Krusty, I’d watch your step if I were you, Crappy could be after your job……