Monday, October 31, 2005

Eh up – there’s a bollocking on t’way for Prezza….

Later this week, two government agencies are publishing a joint report on John Prescott’s plans to concrete over the South East of England.

The Report from The Countryside Agency and English Nature are expected to give Prescott’s sustainable housing plans the thumbs down – and that’s putting it mildly. Word is they think no actual ‘planning’ has gone into the proposals. Words like ‘savaged’ are being bandied about – and apparently they’ve ‘rubbished’ Prescott’s plans to build the houses and 67 road schemes in the area……

I can’t bloody wait to read it. Pressure, pressure, pressure Johnny!!!!….

Is it because I is English?

Well, now you come to mention it, yes!

The very first thing I’ve done this morning, before my cuppa and before I’ve opened and binned the 148 weekend emails for drugs, loans, an extra 3 inches on my old man and myriad Viagra offers in my ‘in box’, before all that…… I’ve put an official complaint to Trevor Phillips’ lot at the CRE. I’ve cited a prat of a Sunday Times columnist, whose name sounds like a brand of battery, for aggravated racial incitement.

After all, if they can censure Anne Robinson for saying that the Welsh are a bit glum, or Kilroy-Silk for his infamous Daily Express piece on the Muslim World, then this git must surely be heading for the Tower.

Why? Readers of yesterday’s post or yesterday’s Sunday Times will know the reason……

AA Gill, Sunday Times columnist, food critic and pal of Jeremy Clarkson has finally come out. He was born in Edinburgh, but was brought south to England when he was still a baby. He has spent the last 50 years living, breeding, earning a bloody good crust and imparting his special brand of sarcastic sciterati on my morning breakfast table every Sunday.

I’ve never liked the man. Arrogant, smug and snooty, I always thought of him as a bit repressed, a bit of a cold fish – a Deeside salmon maybe? I knew he was Scottish, and I knew he had a public school education – so when he ‘came out’ in yesterday mornings ‘paper, I was half expecting him to say how he’d fallen in love with Gordon Brown.

But no, a much easier target for Gill’s vitriol was staring at me in black and white across two full pages in the ‘Review’ section yesterday.

Gill declared he hated me, my wife, my kids, my dear old 83 year old Mum and 50 odd million other souls. Our collective crime? Being born English, of course…..

Amongst a whole heap of other things, Gill hates the way I queue, hates the way I laugh (something to do with sneering at others apparently), hates the way I say ‘sorry’ (all to do with saying ‘sorry’, but not actually meaning it)

But most of all, Gill hates my ‘English anger’- apparently, he reckons that ‘anger’ makes us English people ‘ugly’. Well, I know there’s some right old scroats and visually challenged Hilda Baker and Arthur Mullard types in good old Blighty – but what’s new? Ugly people inhabit all of the world - and, Gill, you're no 'Monarch of the Glen' yourself, bud.

He hates my aggressive, negative, bellicollic, teeth-grinding and all-round angst. He hates the fact that I and the rest of my family - and indeed, the whole English nation for that matter, just aren’t too‘happy’ about things….

Well, you’re damn right there double A. Is he having a laugh or what? You just do not get it double A, do you? We’re all much more pissed off more than angry really, pissed off with our English lives being run by a Scottish McMafia, Scottish Raj and Scottish Artizania.

But I’m personally particularly pissed off when finding out that a sneering Scottish twat, who makes a privileged living in this country, makes a small fortune with his crappola articles and then tells his readers what a bunch of tossers he thinks they all are. Maybe it’ll come back to bite him. Maybe he’s just had a bit of a Gerald Ratner moment?….. I do hope so.

But the best thing is – there’s even more of this anti English shite in next week’s Sunday Times. Next week, Gill is writing about ‘alcohol and the English’. The articles are from a book that Gill has written called ‘The Angry Island’ – be sure to leave it off your Christmas stocking lists.

And finally…. while we’re on the subject of ‘hating’ things….
I hate the way that the English people are prepared to actually take a two page, broadsheet broadside from a failed novelist and all round snob. And the only reason this tosser has written it is his belief that the English race are so damned downtrodden and Pavlovian-brainwashed as to not even stir from our Raj induced, intravenous habit of guilt, of propaganda, of slumber.

Time to wake up.

If you haven't yet read this juvenile drivel in yesterday's Sunday Times - be my guest

Sunday, October 30, 2005

This man hates England - shock.

Posh Scottish columnist with an English accent, A.A. Gill has declared that he hates England and the English. This arrogant man - a man who has lived in this country for all but 1 of his 50 odd years - and has made a fortune out of his serial dismissals of various 'sad cases' apparently hates us for queuing, hates for the way we laugh, hates us for the way we are all so angry!!!

If you want to read this drivel in today's Sunday Times - be my guest

I can barely hide my contempt for this idiot. The keys are tapping away - and I'll expand more in tomorrow's post...

Wonko - for God's sake, make this tosser, 'twat of the week'.......

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Did you see it, did you hear it – on the telly?

My very own email was read out by the new sexy lady on today's BBC 2 edition of 'The Daily Politics'. She read every single bit out – except the last line about us having an English Parliament, obviously.

Cerebral Scottish growler, Andrew Neil himself said after the email was read out that the protests about Scottish MPs meddling in English only affairs will grow and grow.

Email in full……

Dear Mr Neil,

I see the smoking ban bill for England has been diluted to accommodate objections from John Reid, a Scottish Minister with a Scottish Constituency....

No problems for HIS constituents though - the Scottish Parliament are expected to have a watertight smoking ban in their country by 2006.
Reid should mind his own business.

Same old story, a Scottish MP with a Scottish Constituency meddling in another country's affairs.

England MOST DEFINITLY needs an ENGLISH Parliament.

Yours, etc, etc....

I feel as if I've just scored a goal at Wembley!!!!!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

STOP PRESS 1......

English population has perfect eyesight - SHOCK

Well, we must have – right? Otherwise, we’d have the same eye care services as our northern cousins wouldn’t we? What am I talking about? Here’s a clue from a Scottish Executive source "It really will put Scotland some way ahead of the rest of the country. It is a ground-breaking agreement"

Read the full sorry story here

Those that are short of time can get the gist from this -
Scotland to get most comprehensive eye care policy in UK
Policy demanded by Liberal Democrats in 2003 coalition deal.

Racism, alive and well and living in the UK, courtesy of the LibDems.

STOP PRESS 2........

Scottish Minister shoves nose into ‘Ban on Smoking in Public Places - in England, Bill’ – SHOCK

The Cabinet are hastily rearranging the wording – in order to make the Bill a bit more palatable to a couple of affronted Government Ministers. Not a total ban any more, ‘loosely defined designated areas’ for smokers are favoured by the rebels. The ‘Sealed rooms for smokers’ option is to be stubbed out in the ash tray.

One of the most vociferous protesters is non other than our old Glaswegian McBovver Boy and reformed raiser of hell, ‘Doctor’ John Reid.

Rabid Doctor John, baldy git and pointy fingered nosey bastard.

Yes, Doctor John reckons that a total ban on smoking in public places (in England) outright is to infringe the rights of decent, working class people – and deprive them of one of their few pleasures in life.

Just a couple of points here John –
1) You’re Scottish, representing a Scottish Constituency – so mind your own damn business. If you want to mouth off, then do it in the Scottish Parliament. They’ve obviously already debated this and decided on a total ban in Scotland – to be enforced in the next few years.
2) I watched my Dad drowning to death in a sea of phlegm and bloody yellow bile, courtesy of lung cancer, courtesy of Old Holborn – so shove your civil liberties up your sanctimonious arse.
3) This issue – and whether THIS COUNTRY bans smoking or not, is a matter for people of England and no one else. Got it?

Monday, October 24, 2005

Time for a bit of martyrdom?

Hereward the ill is going to collect his prescription tomorrow from the quack. He will give it to his eldest Son to present to his local Boots. By doing this – said Son will be able to say that his Dad will pay for the goods when he comes in to collect.

When the medicine is slapped on the counter, Aitch will pull out a nice crisp five pound note. Aitch will then tell the bint behind the counter that he is not prepared to pay the full English prescription price of £6.50p – but will gladly pay the Welsh equivalent of £5……

No doubt, they’ll refuse to give Aitch the stuff until he stumps up the extra £1.50p….. which he most definitely will not do.

No problem, seeds will have been sown – and he’ll get better, eventually…

He will have made a bit of a scene – and told everyone who is prepared to listen of the health racism being widely practised within the various parts of the UK. He will also have told them of the commitment for every person in Wales to qualify for free prescriptions by 2007. By then, no doubt the English equivalent will have topped seven quid……

Unless there are a few more martyrs about?

Friday, October 21, 2005

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Pretty please apologies… The new fashion accessory.

Reading Wonko’s take on Liverpool’s grovelling apology to the downtrodden Welsh nation, I thought that I should demand a few apologies for this

And this….

And this….

And this is the way some of them think…

People of Wales – the entire world is not against you….. lighten up a bit - take the chips off your shoulders.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

LibDemons. The spawn of the Devil

Further to the pathetic reply from Vince Cable, I resolved to ring his boss, the whisky-soaked ginger muffin, to demand an explanation and abject apology for Cable’s outrageous ‘English Nationalist’ smear.

I rang the Westminster home for Scottish Rajanistas....

Unfortunately, Chaz was ‘unavailable’ (pissed / hungover / selling soul to P.R devil / sucking up to Prescott / at offy getting a take away). So I asked for Gurpreet Dosanjh, Kennedy’s senior correspondence go-fer, P.A. man and the guy who knows where all the local Thresher offies are situated around the Commons. He’s sounds like a nice man – almost reasonable, for a toady. He agreed that Cable’s reply was far from comprehensive. He said he’d get another reply to me – maybe even from Chaz, himself. I feel blessed, indeed!

We were getting on OK-ish….. OK that is, until we trod on the testy subject of the LibDem view on ‘Nations and Regions’ of the UK.

To be honest, Gurpreet didn’t seem to know his countries from his arse. Geoggers wasn’t his strong point, he just couldn’t bring himself to agree that England was a country in it’s own right – just like Scotland.

No, Gurpreet reckoned Scotland was a country and so was Wales, obviously. – And England? All regions apparently. Gurpreet wasn’t at home to any subversive chat like a national government for England – or self-determination for the English. Every time I raised it, he told me "The LibDems were committed to local government, like the Scottish Parliament for instance – and Regional assemblies for England"….

And anyway, he continued, "Scotland was culturally different from England". He body swerved the question about an English culture, preferring instead to proclaim the success of the Scottish Parliament as a victory for Proportional Representation. When asked why not an English Parliament voted in by that same P.R. system, Kennedy’s yes man stated that "P.R. in England would upset the current political status quo within this collection of regions"…

I didn’t say anything else – I couldn’t be bothered. What’s the point?

Sometimes, sometimes, I really do feel I live in a madhouse, full to the brim of ignorant, thick, bootlicking arses who add 2 + 2 together and after carefully considering all options, propose a 3 nations + 9 regions answer.

It really is going to be a long, hard road to national recognition.

Media savvy....

Someone has sent me a useful link to a site for finding media contacts throughout the UK. It is called Media UK

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Dr Vincent Cable. A compelling case for a smack in the squirrel nutkins.

After a very long wait of over 3 weeks, the good Doctor Cable has managed, at last to wrestle with his inner self and search the lexicons for just the right amount of political puissance and produce a complex, in-depth, high quality and well thought out response to my email.

Sorry, exaggerated a bit there. Vince was probably a bit rushed as Coronation Street had a bumper double episode bundle on the telly last night – so you’d expect a bit of a precis job on the reply, wouldn’t you?

This is the drivel he sent me –

Dear Mr. The-Wake,

Thank you for your letter concerning English nationalism.

I, and the Liberal Democrats, have argued consistently in favour of devolution, in order to distribute governmental power more fairly. We have argued for elected regional government in England.

Nationalism calls for independence, which is not something that I support for England.

I value the collective multiple identity from which we benefit in the UK. Nationalism is not the same as devolution, and it is in no way hypocritical to support one and criticize the other.

I hope I have answered your concerns.

Dr Vincent Cable MP

Well, you haven’t answered anything have you Vinny mate?
And Vincent, you do know don’t you, that this means war.

First thing tomorrow, I shall be ringing a man I have got to know very well over the past few weeks, and a man who I’m sure will be made up to hear from me again. I refer to Mr Gurpreet Dosanjh, Senior Correspondence Secretary, Office of Charles Kennedy MP.

I absolutely demand a bloody apology, and I assert that you ‘Doctor’ are an utter arse who should be struck off. (Preferably with a baseball bat) I have 7 questions which I would like answering, which should be easy for a brain of a planet politician like you – I list them below…..

This letter was originally sent to Charles Kennedy – as I was absolutely assured of a reply by Kennedy’s staff. After 2 weeks, they sent it off to Cable HQ.

Mr Kennedy,
I really must complain in the strongest possible terms at Vincent Cable’s appallingly inaccurate assertion in his piece on ‘Multiculturalism and Britishness’ via the ‘Demos’ website. I enclose the address here so you can view it if you are not aware of it:

In the article Cable states -"The threat to harmonious social relations in Britain comes from those who insist that multiple identity is not possible: white supremacists, English nationalists, Islamic fundamentalists. This is the opposition and they have to be confronted. An important element in that confrontation is the assertion of a sense of Britishness."

I’d like to inform you that I am an English Nationalist – and I object most strongly to being lumped with ‘white supremacists and Islamic fundamentalists’. What a damn cheek! Who on earth does Mr Cable think he is? What an utterly ignorant and nonsensical thing to say by one of your supposed ‘heavy hitters’.

I really do feel that I should receive an apology from you or Mr Cable for such a bizarre and ill-informed statement. He is saying that because I want the same equal rights for my Country that Scotland and Wales have, then I’m some sort of right wing fascist.

Can you answer the following questions please and number your answers to correspond with my questions – that way, I’ll be sure you have considered my questions properly – and hopefully given considered, in-depth answers.

1) Does Mr Cable include Scottish and Welsh Nationalists in the same bracket as white supremacists and Islamic fundamentalism? And if he does, has he told Alex Salmond that he equates him with being akin to a white supremacist?

2) Why has Mr Cable not mentioned Scots and Welsh Nationalists in the article as well?

3) Don’t you think that the rise in ‘English Nationalism’ is as a result of the people of England being short-changed constitutionally and economically when compared to the other home countries? And don’t you think this is an entirely natural reaction to cynical, constitutional favouritism?

4) If Mr Cable really does think English Nationalism is a wicked and flawed prospectus, please can you tell what differences there are between Scottish, Welsh and English Nationalism?

5) Perhaps Mr Cable was really referring to the British National Party and the National Front? But there’s a problem here isn’t there? The BNP and the NF like to foster a British identity – along with their Union Flags and their bizarre ideas of British values. And ‘Britain’ was the very essence of Cable’s speech. Do you think Mr Cable has got mixed up and doesn’t know the difference between Britain and England? (After all, politicians at Westminster seem to do that a lot)

6) Can you tell me of any democratic constitutional advantage of any kind that the nation of England has enjoyed over the past 8 years? Please bear in mind that over that same period, Assembles and Parliaments galore – and the consequent dream of ‘responsive and responsible Government’ have been set up in the other home countries.

7) As a democrat, I want what everyone else has – as of right the same as the rest of the UK gets. No more, no less. We ALL pay the same tax rates, yet people in Scotland, Wales and N.I. get substantially more per head out of the public purse than do the people of England, don’t you agree?

I’m a former life long Labour voter of over 30 years. My politics are left of centre and I’m thoroughly, thoroughly disillusioned. Scotland and Wales have their own Parliaments – England does not. The people in Westminster spend 80% of their time discussing purely English matters – even those with constituencies in the far North of Scotland. Transport, Health, Foundation hospitals, top-up fees, foisted on us by a clack of Scottish Labour MPs. Free prescriptions in Wales next year and free eye tests in Scotland. Free old persons care in Scotland, free central heating systems installed as of right north of the border also.

All these goodies are obviously not available to English people. No Barnett formula dividend for us – the English taxpayer just pays for it all. Consequently, people in England have the least per head spent on them in Health, Education, Transport, etc, etc.

When people in England ask for a Parliament for themselves, we are looked upon as being just a little bit strange. No, Regional Assemblies, one step up from Parish Councils are the way ahead for us apparently. Except that the people of the N.E. hadn’t read the script and kicked it in the bin where it belonged.

Prescott just COULDN’T give US a NATIONAL referendum on whether WE wanted a national Parliament or not. Instead he tried to chip away, using the area of England that feels most ‘independent’ in a sorry and utterly appalling attempt to get a bandwagon movement rolling. He was, of course aided and abetted by the enthusiastic Lib Dems. What very strange bed-fellows you have.

So England is in a sort of limbo. No National democracy for us is there? 85% of the UK population have no representation at national level. England is the ONLY nation in Europe without a National Parliament – and you great pontificating democrats at Westminster presumably think this status quo is perfectly acceptable. How undemocratic, what arrogance!!!

Even Iraq has a Parliament for goodness sake!

In conclusion, statements of utter ignorance by the likes of Mr Cable just reinforce how out of touch Westminster MPs really are. There are huge injustices within the UK and as supposed Democrats, you and your Party should be absolutely ashamed of your support for a patently undemocratic and unfair system that is loaded against the people of England from cradle to grave.

Can you please forward me an explanation of Mr Cable’s ill informed statement, or better still an abject apology on his behalf. Or even better and more honourable, an apology from him to me personally – I don’t appreciate being called a fascist, nazi, etc by someone who is supposedly intelligent. Well, you wouldn’t would you?

Mr Cable’s comments are both foolish and dangerous, he should retract them immediately and perhaps you should severely censure him for such irresponsibility.

I look forward to your prompt response.

Friday, October 14, 2005

Hoorah for democracy! (I think)

This weekend, Iraq will vote nationwide on a referendum regarding the fiercely negotiated brand spanking new Iraqi Constitution document.

That is good news, isn't it?…. Just a couple of questions though -

If we are the cradle of democracy - and an unwritten constitution is good enough for us, why are they 'making do' with a pen and ink version?

And - what the hell is a ‘referendum’?

Cable – lost his pen, obviously.

OK, I’m still waiting for a reply from bad boy bigot, Vince Cable, for lumping me in with white supremacists and Islamic fundamentalists. Mind you, plenty of fellow complainers have since had from him the standard I too am a proud Englishman….. drivel from his office – but not me. I got in touch with Charles Kennedy’s Westminster office and asked for a personal apology from Chaz himself. I spoke to Kennedy’s P.A. and he profusely apologised for not sending a reply, he would get one off right away.

"Whoa there Tiger", I replied. A standard ‘sorry you were offended, but the phrase was taken out of context’ letter simply would not do. Cable made an outrageous comment – and I require satisfaction. If this were 18th century France, I would be dressed in a frilly shirt, with my faithful Second at my side and tooled up with a pair of duelling pistols demanding satisfaction from that snivelling wretch of a LibDem..

I put 6 questions in my letter – and I’ve asked for every one to be answered - plus an abject apology……

I have a feeling I’ll be waiting quite a long time yet…..

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Wanted, the cable guy.

Have you seen this man?
Aliases include 'Vince Bigot, Vince Vance and Vince Mince

Talking to a mate of mine last night, he told me how he had just got back from his local plod shop. The reason? To report Vince Cable, LibDem Treasury spokesman and baldy bigot for his derogatory and inflammatory remarks about English nationalism.

My mate had apparently complained about Mr Cable on an 'incitement to provoke racial hatred' ticket. He produced the original text from Cable's article on the Demos website as Exhibit A. He also had Cable’s stock, sod off written reply to my mate’s complaint - and his final, final ‘bugger off you sad little Englander’ email.

The fuzz have taken down all the particulars – and are probably, even now putting out an A.P.B. on the slap-headed desperado…..

Errr, probably not, but they really should investigate the complaint shouldn’t they? I would have thought it was the very least they could do.

But let’s be honest, they’re probably more likely to investigate my mate for being a dangerous agitator, agent provocateur and all round trouble-maker instead.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Free the Monmouth 1

I had an interesting discussion recently about the ancient county of Monmouthshire, currently residing in the South East corner of Wales. It’s not, strictly speaking, a typically Welsh county – it’s not really Welsh at all.

Monmouthshire was an English Marcher county until 1968 when it was formally absorbed into Wales. Most of its inhabitants have always thought of themselves as being of English extraction. The county town of Monmouth is a quintessentially English town - and the County voted very heavily against a Welsh Assembly in 1997.

As Wikipedia says ‘The modern border between Wales and England is highly arbitrary; it was largely defined in the 16th century, based on medieval feudal boundaries. It has apparently never been confirmed by referendum or reviewed by any Boundary Commission (except to confirm Monmouthshire as part of Wales in 1968).’

So, if we ever do get an English parliament, do you think we should ask for our county back? After all, we’re not talking hundreds of years – the boundary change took place less than 40 years ago.

Maybe we should ask the inhabitants what they would like to do?

Monday, October 10, 2005

Kilroy was not here......

Amongst the ‘Fox eats chickens’ and ‘Hitler was a psychopath’ stories in yesterday’s papers was this little article in the Sunday Times.

It explains how the great egotist, Robert Kilroy Silk, ex MP, ex TV host, ex UKIP man and ex Veritas leader has been ‘milking’ the European MEP gravy train for all its worth. This in spite of the fact he never, ever attends the European parliament at Strasbourg.....

Just goes to prove the old adage - power corrupts, but tanning salons, monstrous egos and dodgy comb-overs corrupt absolutely….

Democracy Day needs you!

It's ‘Double D for Democracy Day’ on the Biased Broadcasting Corporation's The Politics Show. Join presenter Jon Sopel for a Democracy Day Special on Sunday 16 October 2005 at Noon on BBC One.

The Politics Show is mounting a special programme examining and questioning many aspects of our changing democracy throughout the UK.

They will report on how the government hopes to move on from its failed devolution plans in the north of England, steering a course towards the possible establishment of self-governing city regions…….

p.s. – They want to hear what you think about the Government's failed democracy agenda in England – so let ‘em have it with both barrels.(And a couple of howitzers)……

Friday, October 07, 2005

Sheep with no brain, no guts, no principles and no mandate, returns to fold….

After a dizzying Summer of freedom from Prescott’s North West Regional Assembly (or NWRA for short), Lancashire County Council have ceased gambolling about in the clover field of democracy and decided to rejoin the unelected, non representative and deeply unpopular, NWRA flock.

Apparently the Assembly has been revamped, sexed up and had a bit of a Tommy Walsh makeover. So much so, that the bright gleaming Assembly HQ or ‘Nearly Democracy Ivory Towers’ has presented an irresistible ‘come on’ to my dumb-arsed County Council.

The reason given is quite startling. In fact it’s bloody unbelievable. To be honest, I find the cold hand of Prezza and the threat of a big jar of mint sauce behind the Council’s decision to rejoin the quango.

Mutton dressed as lamb County Council Leader, Hazel Harding is clearly made up. She cited the reason for rejoining was because it followed significant changes to the Assembly which will make it more streamlined and accountable.

Accountable to who then? John Prescott, obviously.

Regional Assembly Chairman, John Joyce looked as pleased as a Welshman with a new pair of wellies as he welcomed the wayward lamb back into the NWRA flock.

The new ‘accountability’ branding of the NWRA means wholesale changes. Oh yes, we’re all drowning in a democratic overdose up here. A new, streamlined, 18 person Assembly Board has been created, including leading decision-makers from the public and private sector.

Their first meeting is on October 10th. I have a feeling; the first item on the agenda is to issue new dictionaries to everyone in the North West with a revised definition of the word ‘Accountable’.

‘Accountable’ adj 1Accountable to no one. 2Metamorphosis of sheep to pigs - in trough, pigs in clover, pigs in denial. Collective noun, An assembly of unelected pigs. See also Politbureau

Seeing their HQ is only a spit away from where I live, I might just try and gate crash the party. Does anyone know if there is a public gallery in these dens of iniquity, or don’t I qualify?

I’ll be ringing all parties to question them about this shameful U-turn. I’ll keep you posted. Meanwhile, the whole sorry story is here

>BBC ‘Question Time’ broadcasts without your truly…..

David Dimbleby chaired the programme of Auntie’s flagship Q&A output last night from Manchester. Yet again, the programme went out without me in the audience to ask the questions that no one wants to answer.

I’ve applied to be in the audience each time the show has been in the North West - by phone and email for years – and hey, guess what? Zilcho success. Maybe I don’t fit the right demographic? ’Middle aged white guy with crap pension and a mega chip on shoulders from Lancashire’ is hardly going to excite a sushi eating, Notting Hill liberal, BBC researcher. It’s well known that the BBC over-egg the audience mix on Question Time. Most broadcasts are shamefully weighted and shamefully over represented towards some groups and not others. Maybe, they know my politics – maybe they know I’m a bit gobby. Maybe they know I’m not from the right group of people that are habitually seen on the show?

However, on last night’s episode, there was a real gem of a moment. Pompous Scot and New Labour Minister for Europe, Douglas Alexander was called a "little twit" by brain of a planet historian, David Starkey. In fact, Starkey was the only panellist who said it like it was all night. Especially when the issue of that breast cancer drug that I can’t spell being freely available in Scotland, but not in England. And how it’s taken a cancer sufferer to appeal to the courts, in order to get ‘NICE’ to cough up…. And that was brought up by a member of the audience, for God’s sake

The no-nothing, instantly forgettable Scottish LibDem MP panellist (at 25 years old, the youngest in Westminster) and Duggie Alexander expressed almost comical surprise and panic-blathered a bit. They didn’t ’think’ it was freely available in Scotland….. No, they were almost sure it wasn’t. Starkey burst into sarcastic laughter and proclaimed that thanks to New Labour, Scotland was a totally separate country doing bloody well out of the status quo anyway – so they’ll definitely have it. He was about to educate the mushroom audience of specially selected fungii as to what the Barnett formula really meant.

Euro Minister, Duggie looked a bit panicky, the smoke and mirror strategy was looking a bit flaky. The sh1t was arcing it’s way towards the fan… Fortunately, before this dangerous mole from the audience, could do any more damage, ace master of flannel and avoider of all things too political, David Dimbleby jumped in to go onto another question….

Unfortunately, that next question was about Tory leadership candidate, Liam Wassisname and his Union Flag flying from every British school project. Sorry, Union Flag flying from every English school project, because the Welsh and the Scots have been specially dispensated to fly their own…..

The Editor of the London Evening News expressed distaste at the very thought of it – she reckoned it was a slippery slope to fascism. Francis Maude, chair of the Tory Party, said how proud it would make him feel for every school to fly the flag no matter where they came from. He qualified this statement by saying that everyone in this country comes from immigrant stock, he gave examples of the Jutes, Angles and Saxons coming over from Europe.

It’s funny, but ‘they’ always say that, don’t they? They always quote ‘Jutes, Angles and Saxons’ as examples of mass immigration – as if it happened yesterday. They never include ‘Picts’ or ‘Celts’ do they? For they too are immigrants – originally coming from the Middle East.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

See you there?

On Saturday, I will be at the English Democrats AGM in London. Anyone else going? If so, I’ll see you there. (You’ll know me, I’ll be wearing a St George’s flag in my lapel)…

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

English = Racist, apparently.

Anne Owers, Chief Inspector for Prisons, hang your head in shame, you bigoted old witch, for what your report says about my national flag. Read on and weep to discover why she made prison officers in Wakefield Prison remove their St George’s flag tie pins (bought to support a local cancer charity) for fear of the flag being "Misinterpreted as a racist symbol"…

Anne Owers, you are as ignorant as they come - and if anyone should be banged up, it should be you.

Monday, October 03, 2005

Talking Turkey……

Two things struck me last week about Turkey’s attempt to enter the EU. It says everything about where we are as a Country, at this moment in time.

On Wednesday, the U.S. State Department let it be known that Turkey’s full membership of the E.U. was an absolute imperative. Bringing them into western democracy would, as they see it, strike a blow against fundamentalism. To deny them entry into the club would, to quote a State official be "An absolute disaster"……

On Thursday, Princess Tony gave an interview to a Turkish newspaper. When asked what he thought about Turkey joining the Union, Blair, by now, fully briefed on what to think by Washington, said "To deny Turkey entry into the European Union would be an absolute disaster"…..

I wonder who’s hand is up who’s jacksy?
Come to think of it – there really are some striking similarities between Blair and Archie Andrews……

Institutional racism rears it’s tartan head…….

Over the weekend, Aitch, via his mouse and hard drive has had a bit of a clear out. After a bit of digital delving he found a few letters of righteous indignation to the Scottish Raj, and a few, very simple easy to understand, Janet and John type pictograms sent to John Prescott. (mostly suggesting where Prezza should shove his agenda).

Anyway, in the dark recesses of one of my soon-to-be-deleted files, I found this little ‘anyone but the English, Welsh or Northern Irish’, gem. It’s part of a student fee guidance document from the University of Edinburgh. "Full-time students domiciled, as defined by the Student Awards Agency for Scotland (SAAS), in Scotland or in other European Union countries outside the United Kingdom, will not be required to make a personal contribution towards the costs of their annual tuition if they are studying at publicly funded institutions in Scotland for the first time. The Scottish Executive will pay all such tuition fees through SAAS".

Well that’s OK then. Apparently, the good old SAAS will pick up the tab for everyone except students from Wales, Northern Ireland and England……

But wait! Assemblies to the rescue! Look, it’s OK, don’t worry about those Uni’ bods from Wales and Northern Ireland – those guys will get financial support from their own Governmental organisations, won’t they?

So that just leaves plucky, unlucky, skint English students to stump up the cash….

Is it coz we is English?