Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Nah it's just a sad, delusional control freak...

Has Ed Balls, our glorious leader's Hissing-Sid pal back at the McBunker been whispering even more poison into Brown's big fleshy chimpy ear? Or has our beloved leader finally lost his marbles (along with his cohonas, judgement, honesty and integrity)?

Well summat's up. How else do you explain Brown's comedic gatecrashing of the today's Oil Barons meeting at Banchory in Scotland. Accompanied by his pocket Chancellor Allistair Darling, the dynamic duo swooped into the meet to tell the JR Ewings of the North Sea world that they needed to increase oil production - like right now, in order to flood the market - and in the process, reduce the price of a barrel of crude...... And save Western civilisation as we know it.

Dutifully, the Brown-nosing Broadcasting Corporation were there to record the great event. Brown and Darling, the rescue squad were in town along with square jaws, calculators and a copy of the riot act..... Oh my Gard, the price of crood has garn through the roof, who will save us?"....

Fear not, taxed-to-death citizen, tis I,Sadman and Bobbins, my grey sidekick are here to turn on the taps"..

"Gard bless you, great clunking fist - whoever you are"....

Cut to the inside of the hall. Brown, centre stage is hunched telling the boys with the black stuff exactly how it's going to be. All the clunking fist hand gestures are there, furrowed brow, jabbing finger, blood pressure on simering. A Glasgow kissed frenzy is about to break out unless Messers Shell and co 'do something'...

All is well with the world, the BBC's Gordon Brown's Brand is back - and he means business......

And that's where the 'reality' stops. This clown and his stooge have no power to do anything about the price of cake - much less the price of oil - except that is, to take off some of the duty - and of course they'll never do that, will they?

Gordon, my poor deluded leader, oil is a globally quoted commodity - the price of Brent Crude is, and always has been linked to OPEC's price. The UK's oil production is absolutely miniscule when compared with Saudi, Russia and the States. And anyway, we no longer have the capacity to increase output - especially as a result of Brown's last North Sea 'Windfall' tax grab of a few years ago. As a consequence of that act, Shell and BP publically declared they would no longer attempt to look for new, more difficult, more expensive North Sea oilfields.

So today's futile act of gonadship, an embarrassing hoo-haa of no consequence has echoes of previous delusions of adequacy. I haven't laughed so much since Tony Blair said he was going to crack heads around the Middle Eastern table over a glass or two of sherry*....

NOTE: *That's 'Sherry' the drink, not 'Cherie' the mad woman.