Blue Peter was on the telly last night - it was presenter Konnie Huq's last show before she goes off to do lots of toadying for BBC-New Labour Productions (more about that, tomorrow).
The programme almost ended, and a few filmed tributes from past presenters and z-listers were being aired. One by one, the talentless former presenters voxed their tributes to Huq.... "Brilliant" ...."Fantastic" ....."Talented" ...."Blah, blah, blah"..
Then Matt Lucas popped up, as did Vic Reeves. They both luvvie-gushed for all they were worth. At the end of the 'tribute-porn' section, the biggest z-lister of them smirked into view. There he was, capped teeth, botoxed forehead, sincerity stamped all over his insincere face, smirking for Britain...... Gordon Brown, Prime Minister and Blue Peter fan, apparently.
"Konnie, thanks for everything you've done, you've done brilliantly.... Wish you all the best in the future and thank you from all the viewers of Blue Peter"...
Sickening. I mean, is nowhere safe from Gordon Brown's smirking boat? Biddy Baxter would never have allowed it. Is he after a Blue Peter badge or what?
Watching him smirk the smirk, wanting to shove one of my size fourteens straight through the screen, I started to think of creative and novel uses for sticky-backed plastic, bog tubes, a couple of Sqeezy bottles and a 'How to make an AK-47 from everyday household objects in one easy lesson' instruction book....
Gordon, here's one I made earlier.....
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